I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling a little blue around the holidays (and I don’t even mean happy bunny Blue but true down in the dumps blue) so I thought I would share some thoughts. This will be my third year without my mom and my fourth year without my dad and I swear I will never be the same. Yes, the pain becomes more bearable but it’s so hard to approach the holidays without remembering what they were like when they were around. And yes, those memories do bring some happy thoughts but they are so laced with sadness and melancholy that I almost don’t want to remember. My heart aches in a way I could never expect, describe, or imagine and I was bracing myself for this, trust me.
So I ask, for those of you grieving, what do you do to make the holidays special now that they are different and altered. I personally run away from Christmas. Last year was the first year I allowed myself to go to a Christmas Eve gathering but the day the 25th hits, I’m jetting out of the country and trying to forget. That’s right. I literally run away from Christmas. I try not to even think about Thanksgiving though I clearly have so much to be thankful for. To me it’s just another painful reminder of what I’ve lost.
Know that you aren’t alone this holiday season and I’m always happy to lend an ear. The internet is of course full of articles to help us process too. Thankfully we have those soft bunny ears to whisper our worries into and that is something I’m always grateful and present for.
grief, Holidays
